Charismatics - Only one. Hands already in the air.
Roman Catholics - None. They use candles.
Pentecostals - Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterians - None. God has predestined when the lights will be on and off.
Episcopalians - Eight. One to call the electrician, and seven to say how much they liked the old one better.
Mormons - Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Unitarians - We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb, and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, flourescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
Baptists - At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and two or three committees to approve the change. Oh, and also a casserole.
Lutherans - None. Lutherans don't believe in change.